Wednesday, March 12, 2008

How to use Feng Shui to make an overstayed welcome parent move out of your house?

I am need of advice on how to use feng shui or any other tips to make my father move out of mine and my husband's house. He has been here too long and doesn't not seem to have any notion to leave. He is retired and says he just wants to be around us! His stay is getting bothersome to us but we do not want to hurt his feelings. I was hoping there was some feng shui cure for this but can't seem to find any. And we are in the process of trying to sell our house, so the feng shui correction can not interfere with that.
I just want to add that my father is healthy and has retired with a good deal of money. He does not "need" to stay with us. He can easliy afford something close to us. We love him dearly but as an adult, you move out of your parents house and you don't expect them to move back in with you - especially since he does not need to be cared for. It puts a strain on our marriage (only 4 years married) because we sometimes have no time to ourselves. I just want some advice on how to help him understand that we need our space too!
For those of you who feel sorry for my dad that I feel this way, you should know one more thing...
He does not help out with money, groceries or anything but expects me to cook and clean for him. He also sits out back of my house almost every day and just drinks beer - sometimes 12 a day. Now, I have 3 children - 12, 3 and 5 months and this is something that I don't want them exposed to. My dad can't even help babysit if I need to do something because he typically has already had too many beers.

I'm a Certified Feng Shui Practitioner but, unfortunately, don't know of any Feng Shui cure for this...but you know what works?
Being honest!!!
It may be time for you and your husband to discuss openly and honestly with your father-in-law that it's time for him to move on. Before you do, come up with options for where he will move, times he can visit, etc.
Honesty is the best policy! Even if your in-law gets a little hurt up front, if you tell him in a loving and kind way that you two want your privacy back -- that it's not about him -- that you love him, etc. then even if it's emotionally difficult, it'll still be for the best for all.

you need to have a talk with your Dad. I don't feel sorry for him and I am probably his age. If you are married have your husband talk to him. He can always buy a place close to you since he sounds financially secure. I think he is taking advantage of you and I wouldn't want my kids around someone who drinks 12 bottle of beer a day. You must be tactful, but direct

You may want to re-think your intention. It sounds like you may be coming at the issue from a negative outlook. Feng shui will not support negative energy. Since you're selling your house, your father will have to move eventually. Rather than seeing him as a nuisance you want to get rid of, try adjusting your intention to a more positive one. Intend that your father find a new home where he can be comfortable and happy and still enjoy a close relationship with you.
Sometimes the best cure is love and compassion. Try talking to him about how you feel. Let him know that you love him and want to spend time with him but that you also need your own lives. Help him find a place where he can be happy and maybe find companionship as well. If you approach him with a loving attitude rather than one of annoyance, the right words will come and he might be more understanding that you think.

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